Hey guys! I’ve moved…


Update stuff… I’m working on some domain mapping which should do all the work for you, but until them head on over 🙂


Dang… I spent too much money today.  Wait, no I didn’t.  I love my 30% off coupon.  I got a bunch of good stuff- four sweaters for work, a new bra for runs, two tanks for yoga/runs for… forty dollars.  Yes, yes, yes! I’m am the ill bargain shopper.  I should give classes, but then people might grab the good stuff before I can get to it… hmmm.

Before I left, I had a quick breakfast so I could catch the next bus.


That’s not a peanut butter cookie… but it’s the best Larabar I’ve ever had.  Take note that I’ve only had two other flavors.  It was more like a healthy PB cookie not like the decadent ones I used to make all the time! I only ate one of those clementines the other was bad 😦

I had plans to get a taco for lunch.  I had a major craving, but once there I just couldn’t stand the smell of them.  I guess my tastes have changed pretty drastically because I used to work at a taco place (one horrific summer) and I enjoyed my free meal daily!

Jul 29, 2009_2

I got a five dolla instead. Loaded with veggies, pepperjack and honey mustard, just the way I like it.  Bread was soooo good today! Yum.

The lady gave me TWO FREE chocolate chip cookies.


No anthrax, JVal (or at least I hope so). I think it’s just because I noticed that she was speaking Spanish with ease as opposed to English, so I just switched to what I knew she was most comfortable with. She said they couldn’t sell them because when they baked they all ran into each other.  Oh well.  I ate one. It was good!  I don’t know what I’ll do with the other… they don’t really freeze well and they’re not exactly health food.

I actually ate at weird times and I’m still not hungry so I don’t know what dinner will be. I guess I’ll update that tomorrow.

I had such a strange body confidence day.  In my old jeans and a free from work “teacher-esque” tee I still got hit on a ton at the mall.  *sigh* Too bad that’s not my style.


Oh my gosh, I just put a real picture of myself on the internet.  If you know me, you’ll know that I’ve always hated full body pics from 12 onward no matter what size (correlation with that ED onset, no?).  Well, today, even though I’m not perfect (duh) and I still want to make improvements, I’m proud to be who I am.  Once upon a time, I was 45 lbs heavier and I’ve worked really hard to be healthy and to do so without falling into old, horrific habits.  I had to stand on a stool to take this picture fyi… I’m too much of a shortie to be seen otherwise. It’s easy to look in the mirror and say I don’t have guns like Madonna (ew) and I’m not a stick figure, but I like my curves and no amount of exercise or dieting is going to get rid of them.  I choose to be proud of them, and thankful for them since I don’t want to be a LaLohan (ew again).

What are you most thankful to your body for?

I’m thankful to my body because it gets through runs even when my knees don’t like me, and 20+ mile bike rides, and long yoga sessions.  It always gets me where I need to go especially since I don’t drive.  It’s forgiven me for all the years where I mistreated it first by underfeeding it and later by neglecting it entirely and ignoring all the warnings it gave me.

P.S. That’s my mom I’m on the phone with (who else would it be haha).  Also the shirt says “Exercise Grows Brain Cells” on the front, and “Healthy Active Kids Make Better Learners” on the back (’tis true).

I’m going to try to make this fast because I’m not feeling that great at the moment.  It’s just been a gloomy day and I was doing some experimenting with a recipe that didn’t turn out right, and while I’m sure tomorrow’s version will be perfect, today’s left me disappointed after hours of work.

It doesn’t help that since I’m on vacation, I’ve decided that means I can give into my desires to stay up all night and sleep through the day.  That’d be fine if I didn’t have this whole internal alarm clock curse of adulthood and responsibility that wakes me up at a decent hour.

Anyway, I was craving PB+J toast after seeing some on Rose’s blog today.  The problem was I didn’t have any strawberry jam and that’s what I wanted.


Luckily, I had strawberries.  My friend SW wrote about this once on her long-gone LiveJournal and it’s become a favorite of mine.


Nut butter + Fresh Fruit Sammies.  Yum yum yum.


In this case it was more Barney Butter.  It was much better today.  Made me mix regular old PB and not all the flavor kinds I have on hand.  I will try BB crunchy though since apparently that’s where it’s at!

Then I cleaned out my cupboards got rid of expired things, packed some things to donate to the Food Bank and realized that I really need to eat more of what’s in my pantry instead of shopping for new things.  I think I’m going to challenge myself to do just that in August.  We’ll see though, I might have to stock up on Almond Milk and cheat a little bit.

I also walked and thrifted a little bit.  I got pretty dishes, some of which I think are worth a lot more than the 25 cents I paid for them!

Lunch was oatmeal (well multigrain cereal whatev)


Yes, oats with almond milk and pureed blueberries.  Delicious.  Baby spoon required.

Then I tried the thing I baked and it was good but the texture is off, it will be fixed very soon and you will see it then!

Dinner was thrown together because I was tired of my kitchen and needed something that wasn’t sweet in my mouth asap.


Tortilla pizza with TJs sauce, fresh mozzarella and feta.  I would have put veggies on it but I haven’t been shopping in weeks and the ones I do have didn’t really work with this 🙂

I guess I wasn’t done with the sugar though because I immediately grabbed a clementine out of the fridge after dinner.



I’m actually content today.  I’ve been reconnecting with an old friend and having fun doing so.  It’s amazing how the people we grew up with become such different adults than we pictured they would be.  It’s a good thing though, at least in this case.  I’m just disappointed in my baking project but I need to get over that and just dream of how I can make it better 🙂

Have you ever had a kitchen/baking disaster?

I do all the time, well I used to.  I think they made me a better cook/baker as a result because I know what to avoid!

Just wanted to say… I finished TWO classes today. I really wanted to focus- so I can have fun tomorrow… with my very special lunch date(s).

In the meantime just know I had a fabulous day because… I decided it would be fabulous when I woke up… totally worked… Love love love you guys… your comments/emails on yesterday’s post really lifted my spirits… whenever I get discouraged you guys help bring me back… you are amazing…

Throw yourselves a party… go ahead… or better yet… come over Thursday night and I’ll throw one because then I’ll be on vacation 🙂

I am slightly amazed at how seemingly happy I am. I am happy, in general, but being happy does not come easily for me. I get discouraged often and I take a lot of things to heart. People often don’t realize how much their words and actions affect me. Simple comments, even something like wow that girl’s dress is beautiful, send me into a mental tizzy wondering if I look okay, wishing I looked like her, etc. etc. Despite my inner turmoil, at times, I still search for happiness. I choose happiness.

No, I don’t love the fact that I spend more than my parents for a studio while they have 5 acres (and two incomes). I do love the fact that I have a roof over my head, 24/7 free gym, and the security of a building to live in.

No, I don’t love the fact that some of the people I love don’t love me as much as I love them, or at least they don’t know how to show it in ways that reach me. I do love the fact that I have a huge number of people that care about me, and would do anything for me (parents, aunts, uncles, little brother, my friends, my parents’ friends). There are those out there who hold a piece of my heart and don’t realize how precious it is, but I just hope that one day they will realize what a gift it is to be loved by me.

The things that I can control, I will make the best of- I’ll feed my body with food that makes me happy, I’ll feed my mind with the knowledge that will make me the best teacher I can be, I will feed my soul with things that challenge and excite me, and maybe even scare me to try.

The things I cannot control, I will leave them up to God and find comfort in knowing that someone else is at the helm.

Last year, at this time, I was a nanny, taking care of three little people that will forever be in my heart. Things were difficult, and a year later, as much as I would love to see them and hug them, I’m accepting the fact that I may never get that opportunity. Instead, I’ll just pray that they are doing well, and that they are in the care of someone who loves them as much, if not more than I do, and that their parents have finally seen their errors and are actually spending quality time with them…

I had some wicked nightmares last night which brought all this pain to the surface, but I’m thankful for the dreams because my heart does not feel as heavy today as it did yesterday. It came to my attention that it’s almost a year since I quit my old job and I can say that in that year I have grown so much and while I will always regret losing *my* babies, I am so glad to have regained me.

Although, I’m probably busier now than I was then (walking down the hall to ‘work’ has it’s perks, and naptime = study time for me)… I still find that I have more time to do the things that I love. For example, this morning I did a killer yoga session because riding my bike seemed too daunting in the early hours. After school, I hit heaven on Earth for a quick grocery shop.


Here’s all the Trader Joes loot. I spent ~60 dollars but I probably won’t need to go out again for two weeks, so no worries 🙂 The one thing I don’t like about shopping there is all the packaging they use. What’s up with that. Of course I meant to get some raw almond butter but my list read like this- mozzarella, feta, cereal from hangry pants, produce!!! It wasn’t my usual ultra-detailed list. Oh well. It was fun! And most everything I got was organic (except apples, basil and cheeses- they didn’t really have any organic cheese there 😦 ).

Backing up to this morning,


I had a small bowl of Multigrain Cheerios (as in the kind you get in the school cafeteria, sometimes I grab the unopened packages before the kids toss them, most of the time I just let other people take them because the choices aren’t great).


With it I had a juice blend of orange, grape, banana juice. It was yummy!

After another good day at school, I hit the store, and picked up my dinner there…


Sushi platter. I ate the whole thing. In two separate sittings but still lol. It was so good. I love sushi and haven’t had it in ages. I used to go to this place in Southern MD back in the day that is incomparable but the last time I got supermarket sushi, I spit out the bite and threw it away so, once again, Pat Yourself on the Back, Trader Joe. Plus, it was a GREAT deal since it cost dollar less than the gross one I had the other time.

I’m going to have to start going to TJs more often though because my shoulders have marks on them from the heavy bags! Worth it though 🙂 This is an early post for me because I’ve spent the afternoon fighting with my printer (I can’t find the disk for it and the drivers online aren’t working and I need to print/fax something ASAP! Grr)… and so haven’t had my homework filled afternoon, but before I get caught up in that I’m going to head out for a little bike ride. It’s beautiful out, with a slight breeze that will make biking perfect!


(View From My Window Right Now)

I have a paper due tomorrow afternoon that is all mapped in my head but I’m pretty sure my professor won’t get the brilliance out of there so I may or may not have to actually type some words to send to her… which means I better keep these words to a minimum!

This morning I had a breakfast that included a yummy nectarine. It was my last one. Sad :(( Maybe when I finally get back to the grocery store I’ll get some more!


School was fabulous as usual. We did more of a focus on the social studies aspect of summer today with a traditional Mexican story that we acted out. It was so funny and I love how the kids get to learn in a fun way. We’re going to the Smithsonian on Friday and then the next two Wednesdays after that. I think the kids are excited but they really spent most of the day talking about how they were going swimming in After Care. Ants and folktales pale in comparison to that apparently!

Later, when I got home, I ate more of this:


Um, I’m glad this is gone, I’ve eaten pizza two days in a row for linner (?). Not the best thing but right now my to-do list keeps getting longer instead of shorter!

I ended up taking a nap because I was dragging and I knew I wouldn’t get any quality work done without it. When I woke up I made this iced coffee.


I sweetened it with Sun Crystals which is a Stevia based sweetener. I also added about an ounce of unsweet vanilla Almond milk. Honestly, the sweetner had that artifical flavor that makes my mouth dry, which meant I chugged this down. I still have one more sample pack, but I’m not sure what I’ll do with it. In hindsight, the Southern Pecan coffee I use has a very distinct flavor which could be why this didn’t taste right. I’ll give it another shot in something different- lemonade maybe? Generally, I just use sugar, honey or agave because I appreciate their flavors enough to know that 20-30 extra kcals once in awhile won’t make a huge difference in the long run.

I had this for my ‘real’ dinner.


A yummy smoothie! It was frothy and delicious!

Smoothies scream summer to me and I was hot but I hate turning on the A/C because then I get super cold and my joints start to ache (like an 90 year old, yes). Plus, unless it gets unbearable I can live without A/C after all I grew up without it, and I spent many Augusts in the Dominican heat with just a fan. I’m tough!

Oh my I just realized that Safeways sale on Purely Decadent ends tonight, since it’s just across the street I may have to head over there and grab some!

Night all!

Can I just say that I am super excited for the month of August? I have some very cool product/company reviews and giveaway contests (yes plural) planned for the month that I think you guys will love, but in my excitement I find myself wishing away July. It doesn’t help that my heart is conflicted and August could also be a big turning point in my life if I decide to move. I’m being pulled in so many directions right now, it’s out of control! Part of me knows that I owe a lot of my recovery to living in MD on my own terms and that I wouldn’t have been able to build a healthy relationship with my parents had I not moved. I also have a few people that I love dearly here and my heart would break a little (or a lot) to leave them. On the other hand, I now have a great relationship with my parents and sometimes I feel really alone here and wish I could just crawl into my bed at home, or get a hug from my mom once in awhile. I really wish someone would tell me what to do, but that probably won’t work!

Alright… enough of that. I really needed some green monster in my life this morning. I should have had one in the midst of a migraine though. Hindsight is 20/20, huh.


1 cup of organic skim (blech, I was so excited to drink this when I got it but I’m over cow’s milk again), 2+ cups of spinach, ripe nectarine, ice.


Frothy Goodness

On my way home, I got hungry, so grabbed the Zbar from my purse.


Apple Cinnamon. Then I realized I couldn’t eat on the bus, so I put it back 😳 I have a bad habit of coming in and checking my emails and I was so engrossed that I ended up eating it, in front of my computer while replying to some messages. How come these bars always taste like they were just baked? It’s so weird, but so good! I think that’s why Apple Cinnamon is quickly replacing the brownie flavor in the top spot. (Yes it was 40 cents… I’m a bargain shopper, and you know I , errrr my dad, bought out the store when we saw these!).

When I was finally ready for dinner I had some leftover pizza.


Two slices from a small pie (they were maybe the size of 1.5 regular slices, if that!). I never feel guilty ordering pizza because 12 dollars becomes 4-6 meals (and yes, I know I could make cheaper meals at home, but for restaurant food I appreciate that). I freeze what I’m not eating at the moment and then have my treat when the mood strikes. This pizza had tomatoes, black olives, green peppers, onions, and cheese. It was super good stuff!

Then I had this beautiful thing.


Actually, I had the first half last night. Then the second half today. Can I just say there was a time I would have binged on this and had multiple slices. I certainly wouldn’t have stopped when I was satisfied and saved the rest. I feel all these changes in me and I am so proud of myself.

I don’t care how that sounds, but over the weekend I had a migraine and I did a killer yoga session (P90X yoga is long and intense) because I knew it would ease the pain better than a shot of caffeine. Yes, coffee or half a chocolate bar would have provided temporary relief but my body was better served with the yoga. It didn’t cure me, but it helped me sleep that night. It shows me that I am becoming a different but far better person, at least health wise. I even feel like a happier person and have a much more positive outlook on everything!

I feel like these past few weeks, that things have just clicked within me and I am growing so much, and I can honestly say that it’s due to you guys who read my ramblings and the inspiration I get from all those bloggers over to the right ——–> (and for the record, that needs to be updated. It seems like I find another great blog every day!).

Guess what I got today?


Coupons I won from Melinda! Coupons, are like winning the lottery for me, especially these healthy food ones (Amy’s, Kashi, etc. etc.)

One last note, for the next few weeks I’m going to be working on some things for next month, so I may have mystery snacks and some mystery ingredients going on. No worries though, I’m still eating a balanced (or at least my attempt at it) diet and working toward my goals. Maybe it’ll inspire me to talk about my workouts again which means I’ll commit to them better 🙂

Ooo and a question: Do you tell those in your life about your blog? My family knows about and I just linked to it on facebook this afternoon, but there are certain people who don’t know. I feel dishonest when I just say “mmhmm” about blogs when it comes up in conversation. Sometimes I feel like I shouldn’t say anything but All Vegged Out is a pretty substantial part of my life, it’s like my child, so does that make me dishonest? If it does, how should I go about discussing the subject (I’m thinking an email with a link since we send each other interesting links as it is, but that’s because I’m non-confrontational like that).

❤ you all!

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