I’ve had quite a day.  Lately, I’ve been really struggling.  It’s increasingly difficult for me to find happiness in my everyday life.  The weekends are great, the weekdays- not so much.  I’m trying though, and taking every little and simple thing and making it into as happy of a moment as I can.  I really just have to do so to thrive.  This is how I felt my last two summers at home, and now I couldn’t be happier with my parental relationships.  Well, I would be happier if we were a little bit closer (not down the block from one another but shrink the mileage a bit lol).  So, I know a lot of this is just internal turmoil that I’m projecting onto those around me as I did then.  Everything was their fault, and they were ruining my life, when in reality a lot of the blame lay at my feet and what they did was truly out of love for me.  I’m hoping that’s the case here (doubt it though).  I hope that all my feelings and my perceptions of the action’s of those around me are mostly in y head and that they’re innocent of the malice that seems to be directed at me.

I’ve decided that getting up early for yoga is no longer just an option, but instead a necessity.  I think that it will improve my mood and outlook on my days.  I should consider praying through the moments that are so trying also, but I’ve worked os hard to be self-sufficient that it’s hard to ask for anyone’s help.  It’s obvious now that doing it on my own really doesn’t work well.  I think that if the only thing that I learn from this experience is to ask for help, from anyone, then it’ll will have been worthwhile.

*sigh*

Whelp, this may seem eerily familiar to y’all:

51 kcal, 1 g fat, 1 g protein, 3 g fiber

I think that they’re a little ‘undersweet’ but sugar’s overrated anyway (heh heh) so paired with some fresh fruit I think it’ll be perfect!

Dinner was another accident.  The last time I went grocery shopping I basically ran through the store and didn’t really read the labels of the new items I picked up.  Big mistake.  So, I had Dr. Praeger’s Broccoli Pancakes.  (They have egg whites in them).

480 kcal, 21 g fat, 12 g protein, 12 g fiber

No… it’s not two different angles, it’s two different plates.  I made three and loved them and was still hungry so I made the last three.  All I can say is YUM.  Okay, I lied I have more to say:

At 80 kcal (3.5 g fat, 9 g carb, 2 fiber, 2 g protein) per pancake these are seriously addicting.  The ingredient list is also fabulous-

Broccoli, Potatoes, Onions, Egg Whites, Oat Bran, Expeller Pressed Canola Oil, Arrowroot, Salt, Garlic, Pepper, All Natural Vegetable Gum

Um, yea!  I don’t know though, despite being the first ingredient the broccoli flavor didn’t shine through, it was super ‘potatoey.’  If I were to have them again, I’d just buy the box of regular potato pancakes and then top each one with broccoli.  Okay, I lied, the regular potato pancakes have 20 extra calories.  Just serve these with more broccoli 🙂

My favorite thing about Dr. Praeger’s is their ‘motto’

Where you recognize all the ingredients.

Right on Dr. P! Right on!  I’ll definitely be attempting to recreate this myself (vegan-style of course).

Dessert was a vitamuffin… the last one:

100 kcal, 2 g fat, 4 g protein, 6 g fiber

This was the last non-vegan item in ‘my’ kitchen… believe me there are a lot of non-vegan goods in the kitchen just not in my portion of it. So exciting!

I did two fun things tonight (well fun for me) picked up a bunch of vegan cookbooks from the library.  Including, but not limited to Vive le Vegan, Everyday Vegan and Veganomicon.  Now, I know that the vegan blogworld loves these volumes but I wanted to check them out for myself before purchasing them.

I also went to Giant and did a major stock up.  I probably won’t need to go back there for anything other than produce for the rest of the summer… the best part? Most of what I got was on sale!  That whole natural foods dilemma at major retailers worked in my favor, since a bunch of good stuff was reduced- organic whole wheat pasta, some varieties of Annie’s dressing, most varieties of non-dairy milk, organic cereal, organic soba noodles, and vegan “filling” mies (I got two taco, two chili and a sloppy joe!).  Not to mention the fact that I found soy yogurt at my Giant (which I think my boss J may have had something to do with), they finally had almond milk in stck and I found Ezekiel 4:9 bread.  Woot Woot.  I did spend over 200 dollars (ew) but I have so much food and it’s pretty much all shelf stable stuff which is so nice.  I do have to commit to using the things that I’ve already opened (like the brown rice, quinoa and orzo boxes I’ve already opened).  Omigosh!  I also bought three jars of PB and Co peanut butter- maple, dark chocolate and cinnamon raisin.  I know that’s a little over the top, I want very few (very small) shopping trips in my future…. and I couldn’t pick the one I wanted the most 🙂

I also got the results back on my last three weeks of papers (which is three papers, grr) for my History class and I got all 50s on them 😦  LOL… jk… 50 out of 50.  And I took an Art History test tonight that I think I did pretty well on.  Good times… see something happy!

Night y’all!

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