I’m really struggling at the moment…

It’s my senior year. I’m swamped with school work… My classes are intense and challenging- I threw in an extra minor last semester so this semester is heavily focused on Management Information Systems which isn’t something I’m passionate about but I do think Computer Forensics is interesting, and I know living in DC it’s a great “fall back”…

Which could prove necessary…

Because my school district is doing major cutbacks.  It’s so scary.  Basically all our jobs are at risk.  Seniority, education, position, work ethic don’t really matter.  The specifics on how they chose have not been revealed, but I’ve been worried about this for awhile but didn’t know if I should share.  I guess since our Chancellor is all over the news defending this decision it’s okay.

I keep saying “I’m not worried about it. It’s no big deal. It’d be great to get a severance package and hang out at home for a bit.”

That’s not entirely true though.  Even though I’m super busy I don’t want to look for another job, leave my students, start over, lose my direction… Plus, since I’d want to be re-hired in a new position next year I couldn’t take out my aggression, I’d just have to be mature and shake hands which would take out the only possible joy in the situation!

This intensity has led to some really bad choices.  I can’t tell you the last time I exercised (other than the walks and swims with my afterschool crew)…

I didn’t take pictures but I need to be accountable-

Breakfast: rice milk, plain yogurt, protein powder, PB2  and a banana (=smoothie)
Snack: Vanilla Frapp
Lunch: 2 slice of pizza, diet coke and 2 cookies
Snack: Large brownie
Dinner: Chicken sandwich, fries, diet coke, cookie and a cupcake

Truth? I wasn’t hungry after lunch. In the end, the list isn’t very long but the choices were horrendous (except breakfast) and I could have made much better choices.

Honestly, I don’t know what to do. I start my days with the best intentions which is why my breakfast choices have been pretty good lately and I can even make it through lunch (if I pack it) but then I’m exhausted after my 8-3:30 school day, followed by 3:30-5 afterschool group (parks, pool, walking, high energy) plus the stress of getting my school work done is overbearing.

I’ll keep fighting the *good fight* though. My health is worth it. I’ll figure this out someday.

In the meantime, I’ll keep that smile on my face and make the kids laugh… Apparently Ms. Rebeca is soooooo funny ;)

Any tips?

About these ads