This week has been a little strange for me and I know that it has been noticeable in the classroom. It’s sometimes hard to see the big picture and that makes this last year of school (at least for this degree) seem so daunting when coupled with an incredibly difficult class to manage- although it’s fun, it’s certainly not easy.
Today, I found myself frustrated and saddened by things that occur all to often in our nation’s schools. I stood in the cafeteria helping five classes through lunch with the help of only one other adult. It was madness and then when we tried to take them out to recess it was a mob scene. I was ready to scream but since I don’t yell at kids, I just tried to control the situation as best I could. In the end, the principal worked it out and they calmed down enough to get to go outside… it was rough going though.
In those moments, I was renouncing our school and the system for making the whole situation so difficult but every time I did I remembered the first thought I had this morning when thinking of something to write about today-
You see, the other day, I shared my career doubts with a colleague and said how nice it would be to sit in an office, alone, in front of a computer screen all day. He reminded me that it might get boring. Then he said something that really made me so comfortable and sure in my chosen path. He basically told me that I should never doubt my decision to be a teacher because to do something else would be a waste of my passion, drive and innate ability to do so. Coming from someone who I respect so much as both a person, and an educator, it meant a lot.
I know that there are still days when you want to strangle the people you work with- everyone has those moments… but there is always something to be thankful for. Even in the worst situations you can always learn something from your colleagues.
You can take their skills and their drive and use that as motivation to be better and achieve more.
You can take their negligence, their cattiness and their downright stupidity (come on, every workplace has at least one and if you can’t think of one, maybe it’s you
) and use that as motivation to be better and achieve more.
There once was a psychologist who interviewed to identical twins whose mother was an alcoholic. He asked the first- “Why are you an alcoholic?” She said, “Because my mother was.” He, later, asked the second “Why aren’t you an alcoholic?” She said, “Because my mother was.” The first used her mother’s disease as the reasoning behind her own, the second used the same upbringing and DNA to choose to never have a drink.
It’s so easy to be thankful for what is good and easy and fun, but the bad, the challenging and unpleasant can often teach us even greater lessons.
September 24, 2009 at 8:44 pm
What a powerful post! Thank you!
From reading your posts, especially those from this past summer, I think your heart truly is in the classroom. We NEED teachers with your passion!
September 24, 2009 at 8:53 pm
You’re awesome.
I go through the same thoughts at times with my career choice at hand. But what your colleague said is so true on many levels. I’m artist at heart, always have been, and what I’m doing is just another way of me expressing my creative feelings.
Thank you. You awesome teacher you!
September 24, 2009 at 10:50 pm
I agree with Cammy–we totally need teachers like you. I work with children and teens and some of the things they face at school makes me want to scream. Keep it up even though it can be so overwhelming!! You’re doing great stuff!
September 25, 2009 at 11:37 am
I LOVE this post, Rebecca. It’s so easy to fall into a trap of focusing on what is going wrong, and let it swamp you. I have definitely done that and have given up on so many dreams as a result, because I couldn’t see the big picture- just the present moment. And the present moment kind of sucked. But moments pass and riding out the storm means you get to experience the HIGHS as well as the lows.
I love the alcoholism story. Powerful stuff.
September 26, 2009 at 10:50 am
wow. that twin comment was awesome! i am going to remember that. you made me lol with “if you can’t think of one maybe it’s you”. too funny. but i want to say that there have been many teachers that have influenced my life for the better. in all levels ofmy education. and now that my son is in preschool i really appreciate the importance of good teachers. so don’t let anyone discourage you from following your passion, it makes so much difference in the lives of many.